Point of no Return

I am hoping that the home study will soon come to an end.  The social worker still has to speak to our son who has also been reluctant but at last he has agreed to give of his time and be interviewed.  That's the thing with older kids, they've got minds of their own.  When kids are younger they're led more or less by their parents. The way they see it is another sibling to play with but when they're older they're not so keen on suddenly having a little one around the house again.  Their things and their privacy may be invaded and they don't want that.  So, they don't want to think about that child who is alone and in many cases malnourished, scared and sometimes in pain but if we don't then who will.  Other people, someone else, not me.  That's wrong.  It should be anyone and everyone, including us.  We are the other people.  We are them. 

So at last we may be at the end of the home study.  Maybe one more meeting for my hubby and I and I'm hoping that's it but we still have a long road before we can have a proposal.  So, again we are doing all this work without ever knowing who our child is and that's hard because that little light or that little face, that child is not there.  

Can't help but wonder even if we do complete the home study what does the future have in store for us?  Will we ever get past that point?  Will we ever get to that travel date?

I wish I could say yes but really I just don't know.