Friday, 11 March 2016

Smile of Fear

These are some scans from videos and just watching those again it reminded me that Maya can be a live wire and she was one in China almost all the time. She was a wild one. I realize however that separation, anxiety, new parents, new surroundings can all do that. She was either way up there or she checked out. I'm sure it was her way of dealing with all the changes and the strangeness of everything that was going on around her. Not only were we strangers but we were in a large group of many strangers all travelling together where-ever we went. Plus she's seeing documents being signed left and right. Who knows what she thought about that. People were telling her about where she was going, about Canada but really she had no idea or at least it was not real to her at all. She smiled a lot, giggled a lot, goofed off a lot and got angry a ton of times. So when she checked out was a time when all these emotions came together and it was just too much for a nine year old girl who was scared out of her mind. The fear is lessening.

Her smile is quite captivating but it hides many different emotions.

A rare moment of no smile when reality sets in.

When we went to the Great Wall she would not walk with us at all and kept running ahead. The trip had to be cut short. 

And here she is now with her baby nephew Jax. The smile is toned down, she's matured and is feeling less scared but we still have a long way to go.

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